What is it?
When I was in my mother's womb, He put His breath in me.
I was infused with His breath before I came to be in this world.
His breath became a light.
It was a small bright light in my heart.
In my mother's womb, I held that light and I smiled in my bliss.
When I came to be, the light spilled out with me.
I held onto the light tightly, as tight as the fists I held in my hands.
The light grew with me.
Every time I read or wrote, the light flickered brighter.
The light made me happy.
No one else saw the light.
No one else noticed how the light made me happy.
"Oh such a child, always reading and writing," they said.
They dismissed the light.
Then, I forgot about it too.
School covered the light.
Boyfriends covered the light.
Work covered the light.
Family covered the light.
Failures covered the light.
Sucesses covered the light.
Knowlege covered the light.
Pride covered the light.
The light was forgotten underneath a heap of life.
I wondered why it is that I always want to write when I don't even know what I want to write about.
I ask myself over and over again, "what is it that you want to say, Jeannie?"
Then, He spoke.
"It is not you who wants to write. It is my light in you. I put the light in you because I have something to say through you.
First, take off the studies, family, work, failures, successes, knowledg, and pride. Then, listen. I have something to say."